My greatest fear was..

Most children are afraid of the dark things that are easy but my greatest fear was something that laid much deeper inside. As weird as it may sound my greatest fear was love. I was a child who was abandoned time after time after the words "I love you" came out. I was a child who associated pain with love. As I got older boys came into the picture and after soon long when they would start to say they cared about it that they may love I would run as fast as I could in the opposite direction because again I associated these words with pain, fear, loneliness, and violence. Love was not something that I wanted to feel and it was certainly not something I wanted someone to feel for me. Unlike most children my fear did not go away once I got older but my fear grew deeper and colder. Until one day I met a goofy boy who would change my entire world by changing my entire view on how I saw this world. He showed me that love is kind and should not be painful and should never means violence. This was a hard fear to get over and i still struggle with these fears everyday, praying that I will be good enough praying that I will not do anything wrong. Its taken me a long time to find out that love does not need to be earned but that it should be given. Thank you God for loving me for who I am and thank you God for sending me a boy who would change my world and give me your message that I am enough  just being Melissa. 

Honesty

There is just something about saying what is true to your heart.When something has been eating away at you and you just let it out. I do not know about everyone else but I know when I have been holding back and then all of a sudden there is just that moment where everything comes out and its like all that weight is gone. Sometimes honesty will make things harder but nothing is worse then holding things back. I would like to say I hope everyone allows themselves to have honesty in there life because all of my life I have been the girl who is "fine". I put on that face, that smile that the world that "yes, I am fine" when all i wanted to say was I am hurting and my world i breaking. What is so wrong with saying the truth with saying hey I am not ok, hey I am no perfect. When people say hey whats up they really don't want to know whats going to they are just making small talk. Could you imagine how much better off our world would be if people in the beginning said "hey i am not ok". What if in the beginning that kid didn't take their life because they felt like someone cared. What if in the beginning that father never started drinking because they didn't feel at fault that he tried his best and his best was enough. What if in the beginning when that girl looked in the mirror she felt worthy she felt pretty and thin enough. What would would our world look like if there was honesty and not just the image of perfection what if i said I am not ok but with a friend and understanding i can get past this. Just a thought 

Reading Books

I love to read I always have a good book with me just incase. Most people my age do not love to read anymore, I can not tell you how many times my friends have told me “Why would you read when you can just watch the movie”. I love to read because it is a way for me to leave all the problems in my world and read about some else’s. I read because it is a way to get out of my head even if it is only for a little while. I read because it gives me encouragement that there are people out there with problems just like me and in a way it makes me feel less alone. Lastly I love to read because it gives me more understanding and knowledge. My favorite author is Jodi Picoult because she always brings up issues that people are dealing with everyday whether it is a story about school shootings, rape, or even cancer with in a family. There are no limits to where she will go which is why I love her books so much.  When she writes she goes back and forth to all the main characters so you are able to get inside the head of each side because you are able to develop your own opinion.

Family

Today our world is filled with many broken families I believe families should have the strongest bonds of all and yet you see it all the time families fighting and not being there for one another. Even on shows in movies all the good drama is when the families back stab one another what does these actions say to child? This tells them that fighting with your family is ok, that leaving your family is acceptable because it is just apart of life. I feel like God gave us family for a support system but if our support system is broken then where does that leave us? I just like any others have a broken family but the family that stayed has been there for me every step of the way and i would do anything for them. So i say forget what we see on the movies forget what makes good drama because the reality is if we can not depend on family, if we can not trust family, if we dont have those people then who do we have who we we turn to when our world is coming down and who can we really trust or depend on these are just some questions to think about. Who is your family from the outside and most importantly who are they from the inside

Easter

We all remember Easter as kids with the easter bunny, the easter egg hunts, the easter baskets, and lets not forget about all of the great food. Although Easter can be a very fun holiday and I do love of those things myself, I believe that too many kids are only being taught about dying an easter egg rather than being taught about the true meaning from Easter in the first place. Over 2,000 years ago there was man who died on the cross for my sins and for everyone else's sins and on Easter we celebrate all the fun stuff which is not a bad thing as we remember that on that day that same man rose from the dead proofing he was worthy of all. I believe that not enough people are teaching about the right message about an amazing event that took place years ago. I hope when i am a parent i put even meaning to the real message rather then just what the world tells me. 

Girls

There once was a girl who ate an apple from a forbidden tree and it has been all down hill from there. Girls are now required every month to have a visitor who happens to be not so much on the friendly side and never brings presents we want. Because of this visitor girls are also the ones who are required to have the babies after caring for nine months.I feel that girls have huge responsibilities and endure too much pain in one life time. I do not believe this fair because all though now girls have rights they are still not always given enough credit because they are simply girls. Girls are paid less then men for the same position. I do not understand women are cable enough to carry and raise child and work but are not cable enough to be getting paid the same. According to media today girls are also required to maintain a certain weight even while having kids, always looking the part, all while they making money. A girls job is important to the world. I do not understand why the world works the way it does but here we are. I will always remember my grandma telling me "remember when little boys tell you that boys are better then girls, that this world would cease to excite without little girls" 

College

College is much more then school, its a whole new experience. High school and college are completely different from each other in a few different ways. High school is full of rules and limits such as tardiness, dress codes, and classes we can and can not take. When you get to college the rules lessen, when your tardy you will not get sent to the office, and the best part is you are able to take more classes that you want in order to work toward your dreams. Once you get to college you are hopefully where you wanted to be and surrounded by people you like and would like to be around. College is a great deal more expensive but because of this unlike high school for the most people you have people in your class want to be there. There are no one of people constantly talking while the instructor is, there are not anymore kids being rude and uncivil because again people are paying for this education. All in all I believe college is way better the high school from the events to the friends made to the courses be taught. 

Photography.

Photography is a beautiful art that I have a deep passion for. I love photography because it is my way of seeing the world through another persons eyes. Its a way for me to show someone my world, and to capture a moment that can last a life time. My words can only describe something so much but my photos can give someone everything they would ever want to know about my art. My favorite kind of photos are landscapes because they are beautiful in their self. The most beautiful moments in my opinion are sunrises and sunsets, my favorite out of the two are sunrises. Because with every sunrise there is a sign of a new day. There is a moment when the whole world seems to stop and no matter what has happened this tells me everything is all right.This is why i fell in love with the art of photography because for a single second I am able to capture the beauty of this world. 

Television today.

According to the A.C. Nielsen Co., "the average American watches more than 4 hours of TV each day (or 28 hours/week, or 2 months of nonstop TV-watching per year). In a 65-year life, that person will have spent 9 years glued to the tube." Fours hours! As americans we waste so much timing doing absolutely nothing. Children are growing up to be big because inside of playing outside they are in front of the TV. Children are not reading as much because "why read when you can watch a movie". Homework is not being done because shows can not seemed to be missed. Children are watching TV and learning violent actions and hurtful words. I believe parents should not allow children to watch as much to TV, but encourage them to play outdoors to exercise and get fresh air. The TV should not be a reality it should only be entertainment but how long can can we be entertain in one day? TV can be a good thing too its where people can relax after a long day, its where families can have time together. I simply want to worn people not to let people let TV consume your life. Because we are spending nine years of our life siting in front of a box. 

 

Control

In the story A brave new world, there was a sense of control. There was control of who people were with what they felt, and who people were able to be with. People could only be who they were meant to be everyone has their place and that was what was excepted to be followed. There was an order and the lower people had to except that. Not only were they not able to control their place but they also were not allowed to control how they felt about anything. They were conditioned to act and feel a certain way. They were not able to feel love, anger, sadness, fear, loss, it was like they were not people at all. They were also not allowed to be able to stay with one person because this would cause love and that was not acceptable. People were not allowed to have love for anything not having husbands, children or mothers. People also would not get old the control in this book was simply mind-blowing. I could not even consider not being able to think or feel emotions for myself. 

Strength

What exactly is strength and what does it consist of? Our dictionary states that strength is simply the quality or state of being strong, in particular. I believe strength is more then just psychical but its what we can within stand. I believe people are able to show strength in all different ways. The people I consider strongest are the people who show integrity even in hardest of time. "“It takes more courage to reveal insecurities than to hide them, more strength to relate to people than to dominate them, more 'manhood' to abide by thought-out principles rather than blind reflex. Toughness is in the soul and spirit, not in muscles and an immature mind.”- Alex Karras I believe this quote says it all strength isn't the muscles but who we are through the trials. I believe showing compassion to the hopeless is strength. Being able to see past flaws is strength. Forgiving even through pain is strength. Being able to carry on even when the whole world is excepting you to fail this is strength. I hope to live my life with strength and courage because its an amazing gift to show people. 

A farewell.

Most people have been through the horrors of losing a loved one and if they have not at some point they will. I have a question why is it that death is so hard? Why is it that it causes so much pain and hurt. I also want to know why as a Christian this is still just as hard. I am blessed by knowing that there is a God and that he is preparing a home and how amazing heaven will be and yet the tears roll down my eyes all the same. Why is it even though we are not going through the psychical hurt our bodies ache all the same. Death has an incredible impact in someones life, it will either pull a family apart or back together. The thought of someone being gone for the rest our lives is a hand concept to swallow. But the thing to remember about death is that no matter how much it hurts the world goes on with out without that person so even if we want to stop and hold on we must let go and continue living..

Stress.

This week was midterms and it was stressful the word stressed means pressure or tension exerted on a material. Stress can cause so much such as mood swings, not eating, sickness, and head and body pains. This past week has pushed me to my limits has made me see what I can and can not handle. I had no sleep this week and defiantly no time to our self. I was up running around and writing papers. I would go to late and wake up early my brain had stopped working for me just to keep from loosing it.collage is much harder and yet here we are just trying to make it by I believe stress is going to be the death of many.

Annoyed.. grr

I am the kind of person who gets annoyed easily by little things this is something I try to work on and I pray about but this is something I always seem to fail at. There are two major things that get under my skin one is when people complain about what they can fix and the other is obsessive talking. When people complain about things they can fix but choose not to I tend to get really irritated. For example when people complain on loosing weight yet sit they’re eating fast food and drinking a diet coke. I feel if people want to make a difference they should stop talking and do it. I also do not like when people talk just to hear themselves speak this is the other major problem that leads to me being annoyed. When people talk while others are talking or better when a teacher is talking this annoys me the most because when people do this I get the message that what they are saying is more important or why else be speaking?

Pain.

I have felt my share of pain in my short time of living. I have two older brothers who loved to put me in pain either physical or mental pain depending on the day. Having two older brothers also made me into a tomboy, which caused me to have many falls that cause server pain. Even with all the pain my child hood had none of it compared to what I would face once I hit high school. I was a girl who was broken long ago but I thought someone had put things back together little did I know he would be the one to break me most of all. In my experience my heart pain has been the strongest of all. My body changed, my heart, my outlook on life, and I was gone. I could not eat everything made me sick I became skinner and skinner. While your heart is broken its like you are just going through the motions not really sure your alive. When your heart breaks you forget to take deep breaths because all of a sudden just breathing was hard work. I was angry with men because it was another one to add to the list after father number one and father number two. I had one father leave and cheat while spending years in jail while the other just cheated and left. The time I had to most pain was not when I fell off my dirt bike, when I fell face first in the street, or when I would fight with my brothers but when I stupidly allowed a young boy to break my heart. 

Waiting...

In 2002 USTODAY did a study on how many people have premarital sex; this study showed that 95% of people had not waited until marriage. I am one of the 5% who want to wait until after I am married. I would like to do this for a number of reasons rather than just the obvious reason of being a Christian and knowing that God would like us to wait. First I would like to start off by saying that my mother was raised in a Christian home and she still had my brother at the age of 16. Christians are not perfect in anyway nor should we be treated or think of ourselves as perfect, with that said I still believe Christians should try to hold themselves at a higher standard because we should know better. I believe there are many reasons to wait, more people just need to realize what they don’t want and stick to it. Before you all think that this is easier said than done, I would like to say I know this because to take on this challenge too. I decide not to fulfill my wants for a few reasons that I am going to share. First reason is because I do love my God and he would like me to wait. Second reason I choose to wait is because I saw what a struggle it was for my mom to have kids at a young age. Third reason I wait is because I still have a great deal of things to do before I am ready to settle down and raise a family. The forth reason I am waiting is because I want to only be with my husband and him with me, when he looks at me years from now I want to be able to look back knowing his love is real and that I was worth the wait. The last reason waiting is so important to me is because I did not have a good father in fact he is man I barely know because he never cared enough to stick around. I made a promise to myself long ago that my children would never have a father like him and the fact is when we don’t wait we also do not get to pick the father of our children. Not all relationships are going to last so why not wait for the one that will. I want to challenge young girls to wait, I know at times things will be hard but just allow that to pass and know that you are well worth the wait. If a guy tells you otherwise do you really want to be spending any more time on him?

Putting Difference Aside

This weekend was my boyfriend’s birthday and I decided I wanted to throw him a surprise dinner. Little did I know that this would force me to put my differences aside, and I would be something I struggled with greatly. I had a best friend, unfortunately we are not anymore and my friend is still friends with him. My boyfriend is the kind of guy who gets along with everyone and tends to see past flows. He would not love anything more then to see me and my best friend make up again, although this is a lost cause. As his birthday approached I could hear the voice in my head telling me I needed to put our differences aside because this was not all about “Melissa”. As the week went I fought more and more with myself hoping that I would not need to do what I was about to do. I finally swallowed my pride and worked up enough courage to ask him to come. Do you know what happened? He was a jerk and he would rather miss a friend’s birthday than to be civil. I was hurt and broken once again, the worst part is I couldn’t talk to my boyfriend because it might have ruined the surprise. In the end everything worked out all the same, I went on with one more piece of my heart somewhere along the time. I can tell you one thing though, even with getting screwed over in the end I do not regret putting myself on the line for someone I love. I still had a lot to show such as my dignity and strength, most importantly I showed I put the ones I love first and my difference second.

Pit Bulls

Pit Bulls are ranked the number one most dangerous dog. This is hard for me to believe being I grew up with them, my mom used to bred pit bulls and they were nothing short of family dogs. I remember when I was a baby I would crawl on the floor with these puppies. When I was able to walk and the puppies would get bigger I would push each puppy in my doll stroller until every last puppy was fast asleep. These puppies were great with kids and were truly family dogs. All growing up we owned pits of our own and they were always the neighborhood dogs, the dogs all the kids loved and played with. Although yes our dogs were protective of us they also were very lovable and loyal. The pet resource and community said "Dogs most often make wonderful pets, however in certain circumstances, any type of dog can be dangerous. Even friendly dogs, can inflict great harm in the wrong circumstance." I believe this quote nails it because its true dog do make wonderful pets but sometimes humans put them into situations where they become aggressive. Sometimes a dog will feel their family is in danger or maybe even they themselves feel like they are in danger. I believe dogs are what their owners make them. If their owners treat them right and love them they show love and loyalty in return. Unfortunately because pit bulls can lock their jaws so people who tend to own them miss treat them. Some dogs are forced to fight and sadly the smaller dogs are used as bate dogs. These kinds of people are the ones who should be punished because from birth these dogs do not have a chance. The dog we own now was a small pit, we found her tied to a tree. She had cuts all over and was so skinny we could see all of her bones, her jaw was broken at one point too. We believe she was left there to die and we could see there was no hope in her eyes. We took her in, she wouldn't eat for days and she would just in one spot terrified. It took about a week for her to realize that she was safe and everything  would be ok. Today she's the most loving dog although she is still scared of new men we know the fear will always be. 

Peer Pressure (pre-write)

I wanted to write about peer pressure and how it effects teens with their life with the decisions they make. 
I think I wanted to write about about peer pressure for two main reasons: relevance and me being a Christian (in a public high school). At some point in everyone's high school life they will have an encounter with peer pressure, no matter their status or even want their decision was. The one thing we have always had in common we all had a choice to make.  I also have decided to write about this topic is because I was a Christian girl in a public who just happened to know all the right people. Knowing all the right people always made it hard for me to know what exactly was the right thing to do. Because I was a Christian I always knew what I should do but that didn't always make me feel like I was right, mostly I wasn't always sure what my peers thought was right. In the ended I always stayed faithful and people had a lot of respect for me simply because I followed what I believed in. Peer pressure has effects whether you fall short or not I say this because you seem to have regrets   either way. In high school I was the girl who got along with just about everyone including all the people who liked to party on the weekends. I never took a drink or smoked, I would be lying if i said there are times when I do not regret that because the fact is giving in would have made my life easier but another huge fact is I wouldn't have been the smart, dependable, independent girl I was if i just followed the crowd. On the other hand there are people who wish they would have partied a little less, who wish they would have not given in to peer pressure. I believe this is something that follows us into our future, the question is were you in or out?

Listens VS Speaking

I think a lot of our problems in our everyday lives come from us wanting to always talk. It happens everywhere even now that we are out of high school and in the “real world” it is happening people talk while the teacher is, the boss, while instructions are going on. Even when we have been taught, here we are talking, talking, and more talking. Its like we always want to speak but we never want to listen. When everyone is speaking at once it is chaos. We all want a voice but do we really want everyone else to have a voice? Winston Churchill said, “Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen”. I believe this quote nails it because the person who talks all time is someone I tend to tune out because I feel like once again they are just talking for the sake of talking. It’s the person who sits back and listens that I listen to. I do this because once they speak I know what they are saying is important; I know that one day what they are saying may make a difference. I believe that we should try listening before we try putting in our input and before we try to make a difference in the world. 

New things

Lately I have been praying for patience not one of the smartest things I have ever done. I am going to be honest with you, if you pray for patience God is going to test you because being tested is the only way to develop patience. Now if you know me at all you know that I am a very stubborn young lady, strong but stubborn. I like things a certain way and I tend to live by "if its not broken then why fix it?". I have been taking the high road all of a sudden this is not an easy task, as soon as i said this prayer BAM, I was tested. My life was all of a sudden turned upside down and I no longer knew left from right. People who I trusted turned, people I loved became ill and it had seemed as if someone came in and took over my world. I hadn't understood why I was being tested in such a way, but I now know the point. Because its easy have patience and its easy taking the hide road when everything is easy. Its easy to love those who love you, its hard when the world is cruel and turns their back new things are hard but sometimes they can change you for the better.

James 1: 2-4

James 1: 2-4 is my life verse, it is one that is dear to my heart because it has gotten me through a lot of hard times. This verse has been my hope when everything was unclear, when things were broken, my light at then end. 

This verse states: 

 "Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing."

Now I know I am young and people do not think broken when they see my pretty smile but thats only because i have become a master of putting on my mask. When things are falling apart my answer is always "ill be fine, i always am" this is what i have lived by. When fathers have bailed yes two, boys have cheated and when childhoods were taken. I have learned this world can be cruel but I have also learned that I am strong. I know now that I older that God does give me what I can not handle. That everything he allows will somewhere down the road help someone else. If my hardships are enough to give another hope then i am ok with them. All i can ever do is take life one day at a time and keep living by my faith and his strength. 

This verse will always give me hope, while everything seems hopeless. 

Abortion Surviver

This women give me hope. Hope that no matter what troubles we face we will be ok, that i will be ok. She shows me that we are much stronger then we think, yet i continue to second guess myself. This women also shows me that we always have a voice and that i should always use my voice for my lord. Even though when i speak my hands sweat, my heart races, and my voice trembles i know my voice, my option matters. That there is always someone who isn't as as strong as me and i should always be standing up for them. She teaches me that I tend to be selfish because I care about what others think. This girl has been through a rough life and yet she stands here not caring because it's what God wants. Abortion was going to end her life and yet she stands before us and she speaks for those who have no voice. I believe that when she speaks, people listen and that is a true gift in its self. Although most people would complain and blame God for what humans do, she stands there proud telling the world thats she is his girl. I believe we could all take so much from this women, this surviver  and most of all this follower. Some people think that there are no life to the unborn, that they have no voice but she's proof that God will never let anyone be voiceless when he has a plan. This women gives me hope.

Narrative (Re-Do) Fear

My mind was running a million miles a minute “left or right?” I could not remember which way was home. My hands were sweating while my heart raced. I was high up and only could see what was right in front of me. Someone was following me expecting me to some how get us home. Twenty minutes ago I was only a child and now I had the responsibly of getting the two of us home? I have never felt so panicked and afraid yet, I took a breath and said, “Don’t worry I will get us home”. In my story I talked about when me and my brother's girlfriend got lost in the trails and in the dark at the river on dirt bikes. This was a scary day for me   and I was responsible of getting the two of us home. My first paragraph is the climax of my narrative, I hope everyone was able to feel what i was going through at this time in my life. Everything in the end ended up ok seeing how i am not able to write about this time. I believe we go through rough times in order to grow and be able to tell the stories. James 1 1-4 tells me how i will go though hard times but these time will make me strong and show who U will become. This experience showed me that i am strong, good in a emergency, and no what matter what I am facing i will find my way through. 

Lies.

 Lies. The dictionary defines this as:  be in  or assume a horizontal or resting position on a supporting surface. Its funny how short this meaning is yet this word causes so much hurt. Most of the time the lies that people last a long amount of time even though it only takes few mins to tell them and a few hours to spread them. Lies are the easiest way to destroy relationships so can someone tell me why people let them come to the service so much. I don't understand what happened to the good to the honest and to the worthy. Every time I turn around I feel like I hear someone else telling a little white lie or may just stretching the truth. Its only a little bit what could it possibly hurt? Lies have a way of just creeping in when you least except it. Its become such a part of our culture that now most of the time we let them go because it's just something we live with. But lies hurt people, and hurt people, hurt people its a vicious cycle and we are all living in it. People think when they lie and cheat it only effects themselves but the problem is one lie is never effecting just one person it creates a web until we cant handle anymore and we start to spiral. Lies. The dictionary defines this as:  be in or assume a horizontal or resting position on a supporting surface.

Narrative Story.

I am suppose to be writing about a time where I believe in something and stood up for it or even a time where I was in trouble for not following the rules. If you knew me you would know I was a good kid because growing up I never felt i was good enough so i tried to do my best by just doing what was expected of me, I am still this girl who does what she is asked and always does it well. As a kid I was also very shy and never really stood for what i believed in, as I have grown this has changed dramatically because now I am the girl who tends to stand up for the ones who have not yet found their voice. In my narrative story I am not going to be talking about a time where I stood up for something or someone, I am going to be talking about a time where my actions alone spoke for what I believed in and how that in itself made all the difference in the world.

My Own Little World.

There has been a song that has been playing a lot on the radio and it has really been on my heart, it is called "My own little world" by Matthew West.  This is how it goes: 

"Easy to do when Population: Me"

This song has been eating at me for a few reasons. He starts out with "in my own little world it hardly rains, never gone hungry and always felt safe, money in my pocket and shoes on my feet", this is such a true statement. I have had a hard life harder then most of my friends but even my life can not be compared to most of the world. Here in American it hardly rains we are so bless yet i get caught up with trying to stay on top on America's standards on how "I need" to be living my life, rather then giving thanks for everything God has given me. I believe we American's treat being blessed here as a right rather than a privilege. The only difference between us and the rest of the world is we happened to be born here. "I try and stay awake in church, I throw a $20 in the plate but never gives till it hurts". In other places you can be killed for having your own belief and sometimes on sunday mornings I will sleep in because I am a little "tired", there will be hard times in my life where i forget to pick up my bible for days at a time. In the bible there is a story of a women who gives all the money she has and even though its "nothing"to the fast pace of American living but Jesus said she gave "everything", how i wish my faith could be so strong I have no worries as I drop money into the offering. "I turn off the news when I don't like what I hear" every morning I turn on the news and fast-forward to the weather so that I can figure what i need to wear for the day. I do this because there is more good then bad, it breaks my heart to hear about all of the hate and hurt in the world around us so I turn it off but the fact is no matter how much I shut out the world it is going to be there. I need to be strong and help the world rather then staying in my own world and in the comfort of my shell. The next part is what gets me because its when we stop saying and start doing. "Well, I stopped at a red light, looked out my window I saw a cardboard sign, said “Help this homeless widow”Above that sign was the face of a human and I thought to myself, “God, what have I been doing?” So I rolled down the window and I looked her in the eye I thought how many times have I just passed her by? So I gave her some money then I drove on through And my own little world reached (Population: two)". There has been so many times where I drive by and if I have nothing to give I find myself looking down never making eye contact, so what have I been doing? All of sudden its not just about me theres a whole world. I love this song because it should open our eyes we miss so much by siting back and living our own little world. So what will it be a purpose or worthless, theres only sides, because in my option not doing anything is just as bad .

Love.

I have been reading a book called Redefining Beauty, the author talks about a father's love and how it is crucial to a young girls life. How girls who grow up with a loving father see the world completely different from the ones who grow up without. This book explains that these girls will grow up with little self-esteem, never believing they are good enough, and most important growing up with the idea that men are like their father and they would accept that because that is their reality. I grew up without a father and I would have to say everyone of these statements are true, the sad thing is a girl shouldn't have to have this worry she should just have her daddy. While growing up I can count on one hand how many times I had with my father and there was not one day where I thought that it was not my fault. I never thought i was good enough; if only i was prettier, smarter, funnier because if I had been my father would have cared enough to stick around right? It took me many years to figure out that his issue's are not my fault. Later I found I have so many people who love me yet they will never be able to fill the empty space because as old as I get I will still always be that little girl who wants her daddy. So for any girl who never had her dad just know that this isn't your fault, know that every man is not going to be like him, last know that you alone are good enough.

Forgiving.

To forgive means to stop feeling angry or resentful toward (someone) for an offense, flaw, or mistake. Why is forgiving such a difficult task and why is it forgetting an even harder task.  I think it is so hard because in our culture pride comes at a high cost. In our society having mistakes is something that is really frowned upon. We are expected to keep it together at all times; our looks, our actions, and even our feelings. When did we all of a sudden become capable of being perfect? Well here it is i am not perfect nor will i ever be perfect, yet at times i still expect the people around me to be perfect. The fact is that we are not perfect, Romans 3:12 states "They've all taken the wrong turn; they've all wandered down blind alleys. No one's living right; I can't find a single one." I think this world would be in a better place if we remembered this verse, if we remembered we are not the only one.